Let’s talk about jealousy. Yep, that sticky, uncomfortable emotion we all pretend not to feel…but do. You know the one: that pang in your gut when someone else lands the gig you wanted, signs the client you pitched to, or posts a glossy social media update about some fancy project, glowing transformation, or luxury vacation.
I’ve felt it too.
And even though I try to ignore it, I’m not immune. I mean, I’m human.
Sometimes, it’s about work—like when someone books a voice-over spot I auditioned for. Other times, it’s fitness-related. You scroll past someone’s post about their fifth marathon of the year, all toned abs and unstoppable energy, and suddenly your morning run feels… inadequate.
But what’s really going on under all that envy?
We often assume jealousy is just about wanting what someone else has. But dig a little deeper, and you’ll find it’s rarely about them. It’s about us. About how we’re feeling in our own lives and careers. About our fears. Our insecurities. Our definitions of success.
Jealousy Fixates on Results, Not the Journey
Have you ever noticed that our jealousy tends to focus on outcomes? We envy the project, the house, the physique, but rarely consider the years of work, rejection, and hustle that went into it. The early mornings. The self-doubt. The failures no one posts about.
And when we define someone solely by what they have (client lists, abs, branded clothes, followers) we objectify them. We reduce their whole being to symbols of success we think we’re missing. We forget they’re people too, with their own struggles and setbacks.
When Jealousy Blocks Connection
Here’s the other thing: jealousy doesn’t just make us feel lousy, it can hold us back. It eats away at our focus. It makes it harder to connect authentically with peers. And it might be quietly sabotaging opportunities. Ever avoided reaching out to someone you envy, just because the resentment crept in? What if that person could have become a collaborator… or even a friend?
Business—and life—is a long game. The people we compare ourselves to today might one day be allies. And maybe, just maybe, we can learn something from them. Add a new skill, a new tool, a new perspective.
Stay Rooted in Your Path
When that little green monster whispers in your ear, try this: come back to your roots. Revisit your goals, your business plan, your own why.
Stop comparing your timeline to someone else’s highlight reel.
Instead, compare where you are now to where you began…and to where you want to go.
Be specific. Set measurable goals. Whether in fitness or freelancing, clarity helps cut through the noise and self-doubt.
You’re Not a Résumé. You’re a Human.
Let’s not forget, success isn’t about collecting shiny things. It’s about meaning. About the process. About how you feel at the end of the day, not how impressive your client list looks to outsiders.
I’ll take real, messy, in-progress people over airbrushed perfection any day.
People with stories. With quirks. With heart.
I bet we’d have way more to talk about, too.
Humanize. Reach Out.
Feeling jealous? Here’s a wild idea: reach out to the person you’re jealous of.
Comment on their post. Send them a message. Say hello at the next industry event.
You might learn something. You might make a new connection.
You might even make a new friend.
We’re all just trying to do our best. Let’s be kinder to ourselves.
And while we’re at it, let’s cheer each other on, too.
Want more on this? I dive deeper into the messy beauty of envy in this week’s Freelance Fitness podcast episode.
🎧 Listen here
Let’s get out of our heads, out of our chairs, and channel that energy into something good.
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